Funny Birthday Card Messages, Wishes & Quotes

Selecting a birthday celebration card is just half the battle; currently you have to think about something amusing to write within. We have actually combed the net, searched our own cards and trawled hundreds of concepts to bring you a listing of the 69 craziest points you can state inside your card. From the discourteous and offensive to the cheeky and also light-hearted messages, merely pick your favorite and also pass it off as your very own. You’re welcome!

General Funny Birthday Cards Messages:

  1. I constantly restrict my budget plan on acquiring birthday gifts according to what that individual provided me as a gift on my birthday celebration. Appreciate your gift of nothing!
  2. Delighted birthday to one of minority individuals whose birthday I can bear in mind without a Facebook pointer.
  3. Forget about the past, you can not transform it. Forget about the future, you can’t anticipate it. Forget about the here and now, I really did not get you one.
  4. May your Facebook wall be full of birthday dreams from people you have actually never satisfied, have not seen in years, or really couldn’t care less around.
  5. On your birthday celebration do not neglect to establish objectives that are sky high, and also invest the remainder of the year miserably attempting to build a rocket to get there.
  6. You’re a truly hard individual to purchase … so I didn’t obtain you anything. Happy birthday!
  7. Happy birthday to the only person I would rescue in the event of a zombie armageddon.
  8. If you were Jesus, today would certainly be Xmas!
  9. Smart, excellent looking, and amusing. However enough regarding me. Pleased birthday!
  10. It is scientifically confirmed that individuals that have much more birthdays live longer.
  11. Right, allow’s obtain you so intoxicated that you end up believing it’s my birthday and also purchasing me consumes all night.
  12. Delighted birthday! Can you believe we used to think individuals our age were adults and had their life in order?
  13. Congratulations on getting slightly older!
  14. Well done– you have still lived for a number of years!

Old Age Jokes.

  1. Happy birthday celebration– I’m so delighted you’ll constantly be older than me.
  2. Bear in mind that growing old is compulsory, yet maturing is optional!
  3. Birthday celebrations resemble detecting Bigfoot. You truly do wish to see them yet you’re a little worried of what they’ll appear like …
  4. If you recall through all the years you have actually lived, the first thing you’ll observe is that you require a telescope.
  5. Happy birthday– So far, this is the oldest you’ve ever been!
  6. At the very least you’re not as old as you will be next year … if you make it!
  7. If anyone calls you old, struck them with your walking cane and toss your teeth at them!
  8. Yes, we have actually gotten to that age … when every praise we get is usually complied with by ‘for your age’. You’re still looking wonderful though … for your age!
  9. As you age, 3 points occur. The first thing is your memory goes, and also I can’t remember the other two.
  10. Congratulations! You are now old adequate to need 2 packs of candle lights for your cake.
  11. We all recognized now was coming. It’s best to simply suck it up and approve it’s no longer acceptable for you to eat a delighted dish in public.
  12. Don’t bother with your age … alcohol will make it all better!
  13. I will stop making age jokes on your birthday celebration currently … you have actually gotten to the age where it’s really not amusing any longer.
  14. Simply remember the more candles on the cake, the bigger the cake you’ll obtain! Currently that’s laughing?
  15. One more year older and you’re one action closer to obtaining those Velcro footwear!
  16. Bear in mind that age is simply a number … simply an actually, REALLY high one in your situation!
  17. I regret to notify you that your youth has ENDED.

Rude Birthday Celebration Messages.

  1. Happy birthday! Let’s commemorate the very first time you cried naked in somebody else’s bed …
  2. I wish you have a satisfied yearly event of running away from your mum’s womb. I desire that you may never again have to go back to your dark underwater jail.
  3. Birthdays are like bogeys. The more you have, the tougher it is to take a breath!
  4. I hope your birthday is better than walking through a fart with your mouth open.
  5. Considering that it’s your birthday celebration, I’ll let you leave the lights on.
  6. May your day be a lot more attractive than a unicorn farting rainbows.
  7. I hope you celebrate your birthday the means you came into this world, naked and screaming!
  8. Some say that age is simply a number. I say that’s bullsh **. I suggest, you’re getting truly old. Pleased birthday celebration anyhow.
  9. Happy birthday celebration … congratulations on currently being of the age where understand the horror of waking on your own up with your very own fart!
  10. You might be old, yet you’re still a d ***.
  11. Older and also wiser … however still a little a public relations ***.
  12. I didn’t recognize where to begin on your birthday present so I thought I ‘d trawl the web. After a number of hours I located some actually excellent things. However then I remembered I was intended to be finding you a birthday celebration present and also it was far too late. Sorry!
  13. Have a mucking farvellous birthday celebration!
  14. Some points are much better with age. Regrettable you aren’t one of them.

Sarcastic Birthday Celebration Messages.

  1. You’re the least celebrity I recognize of that was born upon your birthday celebration.
  2. I could not consider a message that would certainly make you laugh for your birthday celebration card … you’re too uninteresting …
  3. I hope your birthday is far better than the card I sent you …
  4. Seriously, I do not recognize how many more of your birthday celebrations I can handle.
  5. Another year older … and also you still can not grow a beard.
  6. If I teased the amount of years of ages you are, it would be beyond amusing.
  7. Getting a person as outstanding as me to send a birthday message to you, has actually definitely been your largest achievement this year.
  8. Congratulations on being a year older and still preserving such a reduced level of maturation; you are genuinely an inspiration.
  9. Delighted birthday! Right here is an item of card to reveal you how little I care …
  10. What are you so satisfied about? It’s your birthday celebration as well as you are mosting likely to have to spend a great deal of cash to keep us happy. At the very least enjoy doing it!
  11. Life was suggested to be commemorated more frequently than simply someday a year. Man, you’re missing out on chances the various other 364 days!
  12. I decided to maintain having birthdays because it beats the option … Death.